As King Empress of the Earth, and outer Colonies. I give to each of my good, and loyal subjects one of these for your birthday. Above a prototype. Style, and colors on the way.
It beats a hover board.
It's a fusion powered ramjet pollution-less safe via variable force field "Floatercycle". Btw you could run into a wall with this all day at 50 mph, and at most just get dizzy. You can't run anybody over either...even, and especially if you tried.
Comes in all colors including those beyond the human eye frequencies.
The Ministry of Imperial Research has made this actually "Human Proof". Something heretofore thought impossible. They are also currently working on 'safe' greasy foods, and Algebra for idiots.
You're welcome.
Part II
Another missive from the King Empress of Earth, and the Outer Colonies. "...ahem, ...The response to the Floatercycle was so good that I've directed to "Ministry of Neat Shit" to make new stuff."
So besides the birthday gift to all my subjects of the Fusion powered Ramjet Floatercycle. I've added a replicate 1966 Citroen Hover Car with of course the variable force field safety feature,...again you're welcome. This gift is optional as are all gifts from the "Palace of Heavenly Coolness".
Unlike previous forms of rule that just robbed or killed you. The new Order mostly stays out of your hair. That's why you can shit can the gifts if ya don't want 'em.. Hey it's cool. We just here to keep the roads in repair the Bullet Trains running, and basically all the neat Welfare State stuff humming along. I mean what else is government for.
Well okay we had to deal with the Moon Mice, but that worked out okay when we opened them cheese plantations up there for 'em. Also negotiations with them Jovian Balloon Fish guys continues...suborn bastards. I mean all we want is to open low gee ski resorts on Europa.
Anyway enjoy the Hover Citroen", and we're working on making baseball actually interesting. This is proving 'much' harder than we thought. Still be patient, we're getting there. Also we've put the Kibosh on teleportation for now. A universe of unforeseeable consequences there. We're working on it.
...Btw there's a 1958 Chevy Hover unit coming soon. Watch ya emails.
2 comments:
Uh, I'd settle for a nice sailboat - a tried-and-true transport technology requiring very little gas. Preferably something small enough to sail single-handed yet big enough to live aboard.
I'm not surprised Jupiter doesn't want to give up any of Europa. The Solar Bull considers her all his own. I wonder if we could horn in on a piece of Ganymede?
Z
"Ganymede",...ahem.
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