"My Life as a Dog",...part three

"My Life as a Dog",...part three

"My Life as a Dog" ...or Snoopy reluctantly remembers.

Charlie Brown was in jail again. This time for selling porn in his school yard. "I thought they were National Geographic's" said Charlie. The judge didn't buy it. He gave Charlie a choice. Despite being 8 years old he could serve 16 years in Angola prison down in Ragged Leg Alabama. ...or Volunteer to replace the chimp about to shot by NASA into space.
This was back in 1958 when we seemed to do such things. 

Charlie remembering his NYC Rikers Island shower adventure said,"...I'll take the ride".

Snoopy through his contacts at the Pentagon arraigned for Charlie to get the simplified training course. Have a large spaghetti dinner then be locked on a small box for 12 hours while it was spun around at 5000 rpm. Charlie though technically dead after this was nonetheless in good humor. He had the Right Stuff.

Snoopy as Charlie Brown's media advisor arranged rally, and speech by our hero at his old school,...the one he was busted for selling porn at. Having the butt of all their bullying suddenly famous do not go well with the student body. Murderous vengeance was in the air.

So Charlie Brown convicted felon, and astronaut in a bullet proof polymer box gave his speech.

"First of all I'm sorry about that National Geographic porn thing."

  A large brick bounced off his box.

"Um,...well that, and sitting on Vice President Nixon's knee."

A shot rang out.

"They tell me unlike that Russian space dog they intend to bring me back down."

The mob rises as one hurling everything not nailed down at our hero.

Curtain drops, and Charlie still in his box is quickly wheeled to a waiting armored car behind the school. They were followed for blocks by several hundred enraged 9 year old's. Everything went as Snoopy planned. 

He has a contract for a tell all book riding on this adventure.

Back at the motel Snoopy was on the phone with FBI director J. Edgar Hoover. This in regards certain photographs the director dearly wanted not to be released.
Charlie was in the head shooting up.
The launch date was days away. Charlie Brown had no intention being slammed into the cold monotonous void sober.

...I mean who would.

Stay Tuned for part Four!